Robbie Williams Quitting Pop To Study UFOs
He was once considered the most drool-worthy entertainer on the planet, with his boyish good looks and mischievous sense of humour.
He sold over 55 million albums, his solo releases went platinum, he sold out stadiums, and had hordes of screaming panty-flinging fans hanging on his every word. Robbie Williams was at one time the hottest bachelor in the UK, and was revered as one of Britain's top selling artists.
Then he released his disastrous 7th studio album 'Rude Box' (of which 1 million copes were reportedly sent to China to be recycled into street light fixtures and roads) and stories of alien encounters started to materialise in the press. While most wrote off the allegations as a media ploy, alien-believing status started to deteriorate Robbie's once infallible charm. He then disappeared from view, spent a spell in rehab and took time off after 59 stadium shows in a row.
He is now returning to the spotlight at long last, but thanks to constant references to UFO activity, he now has the sex appeal Tom Cruise post-couch jumping. Robbie Williams's latest tirade involves him announcing to the world he's about to quit his pop career to become a full time UFO chaser.
According to the mirror.co.uk, Robbie was being interviewed by Joss Stone when he made the confession, telling her he'd be visited by extra-terrestrials three times.
"Seriously, I want to go out and investigate these things. I'm stopping being a pop star and being a full-time ufologist.
"We could be like Mulder and Scully in real life," he told her. "You're always mega-busy, but I've got nothing on at the minute."
He added that the first time he'd seen a UFO was when he was a kid, but had had two other "close encounters" that were more recent.
"I was at the Beverly Hills Hotel and I was lying on my sun lounger outside at night, looking up," he said. "Then, about 300 foot above me, there was this square thing which just passed over my head silently and then shot off."
"The next one was the weirdest one yet. I'd just written a song called Arizona, and it's all about alien contact and I was playing that," he says.
"I stood on the balcony and there was this big ball of gold light that turned up - we thought it was Venus or Mars or something. Then the song stops playing and it disappears. But then we put Arizona on again and the ball turned back up. It happened four times.
After that a massive electrical storm started and these two big massive balls of light started dancing in the sky. It was like a whole light show for about an hour."
Robbie then went on to describe the time he was in a recording studio and saw a "big strip of black light" miraculously appear in the room.
"It was three inches thick and it shot from one end of the room out of the window," he claimed. "It's absolutely bonkers. It's something to do with LA."
Robbie is under no pretence that his comments will be well received. "People will think, 'This geezer's been in rehab, he's off his head', he predicted, before adding: "How mental are they going to make me out in the papers."
And according to The Sun, Robbie is said to be working on an aliens-inspired album, which could be used to help summon our E.T. friends to earth at a UFO camp in Trout Lake, Washington.
The Director of the New York Centre For Extraterrestrial Research is quoted as saying, "What better person to roll out the welcome mat than Robbie Williams, one of the most recognisable and beloved performers on the planet?"
While his obsession may be entertaining for the rest of us, others are genuinely concerned for the former Take That band member. Some wonder whether it's the affects of long term drug abuse (of which Robbie has been open about) that is affecting his mental state. Others support Robbie's claims, and profess to have had sighting themselves. And of course, his hard core fans continue to give kudos to fallen star for having the audacity to be open about his interests.
Then of course there's the possibility he's telling the truth and really is about to make contact with extra-terrestrial being through his music. If so, we're sure they'll 'Angels' just as much as we did.
Erm, maybe it's time for a little lie down Robbie