How To Not Be The Embarrassing Squad Member @ Splendour In The Grass
Every squad has one. When sepreated from traditional city life, we often undergo a challenging process wherein we adjust to life outdoors and coexist with the same humans for four to five days straight. Aka festivals.
This process proves too challenging some, so here are the top tips to ensure you're safe from common pitfalls.
1. Bring Your Fashion A-Game.
If you dress up in a Deus Ex Machina singlet or activewear, then you are letting the team down. Splendour in the Grass is not another day at uni, nor is it your average day at the beach. It is a time for squads to unite to slay the outdoor scene with matching outfits.
If you have for some reason not planned your outfit yet then get on that ASAP. Glitter, overalls and gumboots are festival essentials that'll ensure your safety from dissapointing the squad.
2. Pack Your Bag... Early.
You may leave assessments to the night before, but packing for Splendour does not fall under the same category. If you for some reason find yourself without a tent, a sleeping bag, a sleeping mat, a pillow, a water bottle or snacks, then we wish you luck.
3. Don't F*ck With Security
We're looking at your squad's typically "funny guy" with this one. Splendour in the Grass have upped their security to "airport" level this year, so we're fairly sure that any distastful banter with seccys isn't gonna go down well. Whip out your hilarious banter once you're inside to ensure your squad gets in with ease.
Also, know what you can and can't bring in before you actually get there. For example, you can't bring a backpack in, so if you were planning on doing so then bring in a bum bag because it's better to commit a crime against fashion than a crime against Splendour.
4. Its OK To Take A Break.
There's nothing more embarrassing than missing the best acts of the night because you passed out ten beers in at 4pm. Plan your day with breaks, stay hydrated and visit that epic Kanye sculpture. It'll up your insta game anyway.
5. Don't Spend The Festival On Someone's Shoulders.
It's rude and it's disrespectful to the people behind you. Like one song sure, but if you're in front of someone, blocking them from enjoying their favourite band, you're gonna turn around to see a face like this....
Party Hard & Stay Safe!
- Haydn Hickson