30 Thoughts I Had Watching 'The Hills: New Beginnings' Episode 5
We've just had confirmation that The Hills: New Beginnings will be coming back for a season 2 which means you'll be getting at least 20 more of these recaps! Go off!!!!!!
It's episode 5 and we are well and truly in the thick of things, folks. Join me as we waddle our way through the highs, lows and crystals with 30 thoughts I had watching this ep.
1. Hello to this meditating dog and this meditating dog ONLY.
2. Paying someone to lead you in a beachside meditation session before going fkn ham in Vegas is exactly why these people are on TV.
3. Is it time to maybe fire Joey as Audrina's lazy stylist and friend?
4. Get yourself someone who looks at you like one of Heidi's eyes looks at wine.
5. They have cheers'd about 9 times already.
6. Dammit who gave Spencer 'shrooms again?!
7. Ok one thing I have learned from this show is that people will not get up to greet you when you arrive. But they'll also mention the fact that they won't be getting up.
8. "Can we get a salad too?" AHHAHHAHSHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHHAHHAHA (????)
9. I feel sad Brody and Spencer have broken up.
10. I bet meditating beach dog could mend their relationship.
11. Brandon Lee has never met a fluro he doesn't like.
12. Fuck me the dog game is good this ep. This little sleepy guy is me every sunday on the couch deeply regretting what I did the night before.
13. Anyway here's Heidi again with a huge fuck off glass of booze. My spirit animal.
14. When Uber Eats give me a refund after I complain about cold food:
15. Frankie feels guilty for being in Vegas while Brody's house is on fire.....however he will party on. It's what Brody would have wanted.
16. AUDRINA!!! FIRE JOEY AS YOUR STYLIST!!! ALL SHE DOES IS PUT YOU IN THIS HAT!!!!
17. Wow Steph is 'over the fires'. Savage.
18. To be fair Justin Bobby is shady.
19. Come thru, Dr Drew.
20. Jason is allergic to wine, he breaks out in handcuffs. Solid joke.
21. I love it when Heidi slips and says something profound.
22. We stan Jason. Good on you for overcoming your demons, boo.
23. Bloody terrifying.
24. Where is meditation beach dog when you need him?
25. Dracula called, he wants his outfit back.
26. This is your weekly reminder that I think Mischa Barton is cool.
27. In case it wasn't clear, STEPHANIE DOESN'T GIVE A FLYING EFF ABOUT THE FIRES.
28. Lol, "you're kind of a bitch," is exactly what I say to myself in the mirror each morning.
29. Wow don't you daaaaare tell my queen Mischa to shoosh!!!!!!!
30. Steph....I just.....no words.
Make sure you tune in to The Hills: New Beginnings Tuesdays at 12pmAU/2pmNZ with an encore at 9pm - only on MTV!
PICS: Check Out How The Hills' Stephanie Pratt Has Changed Over The Years...
PICS: Check Out How The Hills' Stephanie Pratt Has Changed Over The Years
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